I Don’t Feel Like Myself Anymore: Finding Yourself Again

Life doesn’t always look the way we expected, and when your roles shift, it can leave you asking, “Who am I now?”

In this episode of Trusting Her Journey, we talk about how to find yourself again when life changes everything. Whether you’ve entered motherhood, moved for your spouse’s career, launched a new business, or you're in a new season you don't feel prepared for, this conversation is for you.

You’ll hear real stories, honest struggles, and practical tools to help you:

• Recognize the signs you’re living from an outdated version of yourself
• Release the pressure to be who you “used to be”
• Reconnect with who you’re becoming
• Root your identity in God’s truth, not in roles or titles

We’ll also name the hard but freeing truths many women overlook:
✨ The quiet grief of letting go of roles you’ve lived in for years
✨ Why clinging to an old version of yourself won’t help you grow
✨ How to release old measures of worth and make room for new possibilities
✨ Why God’s definition of your identity has never been tied to a title

💡 Fuel for the Road Ahead:
You weren’t wasting time in past seasons, you were fulfilling your purpose for that moment. Now God is inviting you into what’s next.

💭 Reflection Question:
If you had to introduce yourself without listing your roles, what would you say?

New episodes drop every week.

🔗 Resources & Announcements

We’re building a supportive online community.
Stay tuned for ways to connect with us off the podcast and meet other listeners on the journey.

Let’s Stay Connected

Follow the show on Instagram → @trustingherjourneypodcast
Follow Felicia → @soulguidedhealing_wellness
Follow Christalyn → @christalynthecounselor

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Got a topic you’d love us to cover, or a story to share?
Email us: hello@trustingherjourney.com

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who needs it.

Looking for Therapy?

Christalyn is a Licensed Professional Counselor in South Carolina. She offers faith-integrated therapy for women navigating burnout, boundaries, and emotional exhaustion.
→ carolinacounselingsc.com

Felicia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Licensed Mental Health Therapist in Virginia, Georgia, and Texas,  She provides trauma-informed, somatic-based therapy for women ready to heal and reconnect with themselves.
→ soulguidedhealing...

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to the Trust in Her Journey podcast. I'm Felicia.

SPEAKER_01 0:03

And I'm Krystalyn.

SPEAKER_00 0:05

This podcast is a safe space for women who are carrying a lot. Women who are trying to trust themselves again while managing the weight of their roles and responsibilities.

SPEAKER_01 0:15

We know what it's like to feel stretched thin because you're constantly showing up for everyone and putting your own needs last. Here, we have honest conversations about the silent struggles many women face.

SPEAKER_00 0:27

We're so glad you're here. In every episode, we'll talk about the real challenges women navigate, whether it's juggling work and family, carving out time for yourself or learning to trust your instincts again.

SPEAKER_01 0:40

You'll hear us share personal stories and lessons from our experience to help you trust your path and rethink what peace and balance actually looks like for you.

SPEAKER_00 0:50

Our goal is to guide you through the hard moments with honest conversations about boundaries, self-care and leaning on your faith for strength.

SPEAKER_01 0:59

If you've been feeling overwhelmed, unseen, or unsure about how to care for yourself while caring for everyone else, you're in the right place.

SPEAKER_00 1:07

Just a quick heads up, this podcast isn't a substitute for working with a licensed counselor or therapist, but don't worry, if you need that kind of support, we've got some resources for you in the show notes. Let's start the conversation.

SPEAKER_01 1:26

All right, welcome to Trusting Her Journey. I'm Krystalyn. And I'm Felicia. Hey, Felicia, how are you? I'm doing good. How are you? I'm doing good. Today, I want to talk about something that's really important to a lot of our listeners. I want to talk about something that impacts us in a way that I don't even think you realize today. it's affecting you until you're like in the middle of it. And that's when your roles maybe are changing or shifting and it's, shaped your identity in a way maybe you hadn't considered before you know like some mornings when you wake up and think I used to get I think you mentioned this in another episode how you used to work out a certain way or a certain time of day before right and then now that you're a mom and a wife and an entrepreneur you can't do things the way you literally you can't do things the way that you used to um and sometimes well yeah just that sometimes you just can't do things And I don't know, sometimes I have a lot of feelings about that.

SPEAKER_00 2:44

Yeah, a whole lot of feelings. And if we can be honest, I feel like it can be hard to admit that you can't do things the way that you did them in the past or even that your identity or your roles are changing and they don't look the same way that they did before. So before we even go into a detailed conversation about this because as you mentioned, this is something that I feel our listeners will benefit from, but we could also benefit from this because this is a topic you and I talk about often. outside of the podcast. So bringing it to the podcast is it's definitely so many mixed feelings that I have, but you know, feelings of joy and excitement to share this, but also healing and just transformation for so many of us. But before we get there, I do want to ask you when you think back to the times you felt this way, what was the hardest part for you to admit, especially if you felt that your identity has changed and any capacity or any season of life or even your roles are changing what was the hardest part for you to admit um

SPEAKER_01 4:05

i think the hardest part for me to admit was well girl you asked for this you literally prayed to be able to become a mom and so um and so it's never that i'm It's not that I ever felt ungrateful.

SPEAKER_00 4:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:26

So that's not it.

SPEAKER_00 4:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:29

I've always had gratitude, never resented it. I think it's more of this is a lot to manage.

SPEAKER_00 4:37

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 4:37

And I want to do it well.

SPEAKER_00 4:39

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 4:40

And so what does it mean? What might happen? What could happen if I don't do it well?

SPEAKER_00 4:46

Right.

SPEAKER_01 4:48

So and then what does that say about me?

SPEAKER_00 4:51

if

SPEAKER_01 4:51

I don't do well what does not doing it well even look like what does that even mean so those kind of questions but more so than anything is like you pray for this you ask for this so it's almost like you don't even get to complain

SPEAKER_00 5:05

or

SPEAKER_01 5:07

excuse me state the facts right because yes yes talking about what's going on in my real life it's not always complaining but no don't but you Part of the part of me that's even still working through that, right? Just because you're sharing what's happening doesn't mean you're complaining. Reminding myself of that. I still think, well, this is what you pray for. So just deal with it.

SPEAKER_00 5:31

Yeah, that touched me in so many ways because it felt like it aligned with where I have been in life. The other part to that, specifically for me, I feel is some moments it was hard for me to admit that my identity was shifting, that my roles were shifting. being by myself and not saying that we weren't in a relationship, but I live by myself. I was kind of doing all of the things, you know, I, Sometimes I describe it as that was probably the peak of my life. Like I could just, you know, go out, do everything. Don't have to consider not, well, I didn't have to consider anyone else. I didn't have to think about meals. I didn't have to think about daycare, school, all of those things. And it was hard for me to even admit that things had shifted because of part of me was still living in the past or that former version of who I was. who I was. So it was kind of like this internal battle that I was dealing with that I did not want to admit that things were changing. I knew I was a mom. I was so happy to be a mom. I'm still happy to be a mom. I'm happy to be a wife. And it was like, oh my goodness, this is a lot. This is a lot. And even hearing you mention the word, like you didn't want to seem ungrateful Thank you so much. to one of the episodes we recorded around, I can be grateful and still grieving this version of myself that I'm no longer connected to.

SPEAKER_01 7:48

Right. Yeah, I agree with you 100%. I think part of the problem comes when we keep trying to live from that other identity, right? So you still want to go hang out with friends. You still want... frequent long weekends away not that you can't have weekends away but they may not be able to be frequent

SPEAKER_00 8:15

yes

SPEAKER_01 8:16

um just depending on where you are in your life how old your kids are where you are in your business or your marriage or whatever um so some of us kind of move into these new roles with the same mindset and we are frustrated or we do feel resentment because we want to still be able to do things the way we used to um I think I was sharing with you before, I can think about something small. Well, it's not really small. It's big to me. Like when my daughter was small, younger, and we used to be able, she was in daycare, right? So it's different when they go to daycare because they can be there till six.

SPEAKER_00 8:53

Girl, yes. and not that we even want to leave them there to see she never

SPEAKER_01 9:00

said she only states a five but still she could with the idea that she could be if we needed her to be was still helpful but um we will use those days to go on dates

SPEAKER_00 9:13

yes right

SPEAKER_01 9:14

and it's hard going to date if you got to be done by one o'clock to get in the car for a lot. Or just like family trips used to look different when she was smaller. Granted, there were more things we had to do for her because she couldn't do a lot for herself because she was younger. However, we didn't have the restriction of school schedule. So now that she's in school, we can only do spring break, Christmas break, summer break. But before when she was younger, We were able to go, we could go a week or two weeks somewhere and it didn't matter when we went, as long as he and I could take off of work. So even those things changing within the role of being a mom is still kind of like, okay, now I'm not just a mom of a baby or a toddler. Now I'm the mom of a school age kid. I ain't never did that before. That's hard. Yes. And deciding what's the right school, making sure that she has everything that she needs to be at her best while she's at school. All of those things are difficult. And lots of people can share with you what their kids experiences were, how they parented during that time. But God gave her to me, not to anybody else. And she did not come with a handbook. So, although I'm grateful to have lots of moms who are really wise and I think are really good moms, she's still my kid. And part of it is I really want to be at my best, but also their advice could only take me so far because it might or might not work for her. It may or may not apply to her.

SPEAKER_00 10:51

Yes. No, I agree.

SPEAKER_01 10:53

So I can't just keep trying to do things the way I used to do things. Yes. Even think about things the way I used to. And that's just in my role as a mom. We're not even going to talk about as a wife or entrepreneur.

SPEAKER_00 11:05

Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, I think about that, especially as someone who is a spouse of a person that's in the military, like what? Thinking back to what my life was like in 2019 compared to what it's like in 2025, it's so different. And I'm learning how to navigate, not just you're a military spouse, you're a mom. First of all, let me just make this disclaimer. I am not your typical military spouse. Okay. I'm not like army wives off a lifetime at all. Like, and I think that also plays off of my husband because he is the same way. Like we are who we are outside of the military. And there have been some changes that has caused my life to completely shift in terms of being around family, being around friends. And so when you are in that state of change, your identity is already shifting and then you feel isolated because you're in a new area that you don't even know anyone. Like you're in a state where you know absolutely no one around you. Not one person. Not one person. But your spouse and your kids. And at the time, Nola wasn't even born. So it was just me and him, you know? Wow. Yeah. So that's a whole different, whole different conversation. But that was the moment that I did realize, oh, things are shifting and you can't continue to hold on to what life looked like for you when you were in Richmond or what life looked like for you when you were at this church or with this friend group. And it kind of plays into the part of like knowing what the real cost can be for us when we are holding on to our outdated identities it will keep us in a state of autopilot where we're just on go at all times I felt like I was honestly saying yes to things and I know that they were draining me or it was just too much to deal with but I just wanted to find myself I wanted to find So I was trying any and everything just to see what was stick for me.

SPEAKER_01 13:28

Yeah. And so then when you realize what helped you to realize that that's what you were doing and then that wasn't working. How did you know it wasn't working?

SPEAKER_00 13:40

I didn't even feel like myself. And it wasn't just the part of, oh, who am I? I just didn't feel connected to Felicia. I felt like I was trying to latch on to something, somebody else's routine. As you even mentioned, somebody else's advice. I was trying to do things based off of a playbook that was never created for me. It was created for someone else. And I noticed that because I'm caught myself in a constant state of just like sadness. I felt depressed. I was questioning like, why is this happening to me? Why can't I find this? Why is it like this? Why do I have to be here? If I can be 100% honest, at one point, I was like, God, I know you did not put me here in this tale. Like, what is the purpose? What's the reason? Like, why am I here? What is this? And During those moments, I think I had a wake up call. Really, it would probably I would say about nine, 10 months postpartum with Nola. I was just like, this is not you. And this is not the version of you that not only you want your daughter to see, but you want to be a part of. Right. So I think that's where the shift happened for me. And then the action started to take place.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

Yeah. So when you decided to. I don't like this version of me. I'm not living a life that even I'm pleased with. And obviously that's something I think a lot of women, obviously it's not the right phrase because I don't think it's obvious for a lot of women. So if we, because we have been doing our own internal work, right? And we have a level of awareness that helps us to know like, okay, and it might not be immediate, So even for some of our listeners, it might not be immediate for you either. to be transparent it's okay I just want to put this on record it is okay to not be okay and to share with whoever you decide is your safe person to share with them I'm not okay maybe you don't have the language to say what's really wrong maybe you do feel a little bit of shame or guilt or whatever about what the reality is but at the least let someone who loves and cares about you know that you're okay girl at Pray for me. I don't really know what to tell you to pray, but they went up for me. And then, of course, we could talk about later how how that can look in a practical sense. But I think at the very least, start there when you notice you don't feel the way you used to feel or even the way you would like to feel to reach out to someone who cares about you for support.

SPEAKER_00 17:00

Yeah, I agree. And I think even, you know, sometimes a lot of us are afraid to reach out to someone because we can't even admit or be honest with ourselves that something is happening. And so you do have to be honest with yourself, there's a level of self awareness that you have to have to say like, hey, something is off, I don't feel right. And then it's okay, if those are the only words you have to describe to your friends, because your friends may have or friends, family therapists, they may have the exact tools or the words or the support to give you to help you navigate the next phase

SPEAKER_01 17:40

of

SPEAKER_00 17:41

what's next.

SPEAKER_01 17:42

Yes, exactly. I agree. So many women pour themselves into their role as parents, their role in their jobs. I guess I really want to talk a little bit about what do you think is Why do you think so many of us, once we feel like we know what our purpose is and we're clear, like we feel like we don't have identity issues. Like I know who I am. I know what I was created to do. And then you become a mom or you become a wife or your job has you to move somewhere else or you get fired and have to switch roles or whatever. And now things have to shift. Why do you think it is so hard for some of us to shift? Like, I wonder if... Were you taught that it's okay to have more than one purpose? Because obviously we know we can have more than one role. That goes without saying. So were you taught that it's okay to have more than one purpose in your life?

UNKNOWN 18:45

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 18:46

I do feel like, I don't know if it was a deep dive conversation, but I did see it in action in many different ways. You know, I can even think back to my aunt, like she went to school, you know, did all of the things, graduated college, had goals for herself. She raised two kids. And then I remember seeing her go through her grad school program and like launching the and i don't want to say second half of her life but the additional purpose yeah yeah act two of her life and just watching her play that out i think watching so many of my aunts kind of play that out after divorce after marriage after raising kids while it's It wasn't a full-on conversation. I do feel like I witnessed that in action. And even... watching them do that, I still feel like internally it didn't click for me until recently. So it's like you can witness it or people can kind of talk about it around you. But once you're in the thick of being a mom, being a wife, you feel like that is all that I am. Those are the only roles that I can occupy. And I don't even want to think about what's next because I'm 100% claiming and owning this and this is who I will be. I

SPEAKER_01 20:21

agree. I agree. So they taught you by demonstration.

SPEAKER_00 20:25

Of course. A hundred percent. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:28

I wonder, I wonder, and maybe they're listening if they know what impact they had.

SPEAKER_00 20:34

Yeah. They, they all had a major impact on me. I love them deeply. So thank you. If you're listening.

SPEAKER_01 20:42

I do. I mean, I think this is important for us to talk about because I think that's What you explained is not always demonstrated for a lot of women.

SPEAKER_00 20:52

So

SPEAKER_01 20:53

many women feel lost when life changes. Our roles are not our only purpose. So, yes, your role, my role. I'm a wife. I'm a mom. I'm a sister. Obviously, I'm a daughter, a friend. I'm a business owner. But maybe those are just my assignments.

SPEAKER_00 21:17

Yes. Oh, I like that.

SPEAKER_01 21:19

Yeah. Yeah. They're my assignments. They're beautiful. They're important. They're important to me. They're important to God because he gave them to me. But he gave them to me for a season. Right. Right. Now, one thing I will say about my friends who are moms and who've been moms longer than me, they remind me like she is gonna leave at some point. At least you hope she will. But she's gonna grow up. She's not gonna always be a baby. I say she's always gonna be my baby, but she's not gonna always be a baby. And so that is evidence to me that my role as a mom is an assignment and it's a seasonal one meaning like every season of her life it's going to be different and I'm going to have to shift or pivot how I show up in her life and definitely when she becomes an adult but our purpose is deeper than a title it's the why God put me here it's my unique way of showing people who God created me to be. And that's an everyday thing that I have to do. Of course, obviously the listeners know by now, my faith 100% contributes to how I show up. But I think sometimes maybe, and what do you think? Do you think that the role we have, like if I'm living this life, because I'm living this life as a mom, wife, entrepreneur and all the things, and I'm showing up every day trying to figure out like okay once this is done and I'm trying to decide what my next is do you think or what do you think that does when if I'm trying because you already said like I had to realize I couldn't keep doing the same things I was doing before and so when women get stuck trying to keep doing things the way they were doing things before, and they didn't have the same picture, they didn't have the same representation that you had, what do you think that does for them? How would they know, like, it's probably time for you to reevaluate if you are stuck in this old identity. It's probably time for you to consider maybe looking at things in a deeper way. How would a woman know that? What would some of the signs be?

SPEAKER_00 23:47

We kind of talked about it before, but what I typically see in practice and what I experience was just this, the constant question that I have for myself and what I hear often is, who am I? Who am I? What is my purpose? What am I supposed to be doing? I've even heard things like, why am I here? That's been a thing. Why am I here? How do I show up here? How do I show up in many different spaces? Those are some of the common things that I hear. but also I've experienced. Another thing is just you feel depleted. I just, I feel like there's a disconnection. So you're constantly, you constantly feel stressed out. I've even noticed lately there has been this theme where some folks that I engage with in many different settings, they're like, oh my God, I hate when it's time for people to come around and say, who are you? What do you do? I get so stumped on that. That question makes me so furious. And a lot of times I'm like, yeah, I bet when you are only trying to use the roles that you occupy as your answer. And especially when you feel disconnected from those roles. So let's just say if you are an HR exec or a business owner and you're just like, man, this business is stressing me out. These employees are stressing me out. My supervisor, there's already a lot of tension and stress in those areas, when it's time for you to share more about who you are, the first thing that typically comes to mind for them is like, oh, I'm an HR executive. Oh, I'm a therapist. Oh, you know, but who

SPEAKER_01 25:42

are you, though?

SPEAKER_00 25:43

But who are you?

SPEAKER_01 25:45

You do.

SPEAKER_00 25:45

And those things start to burn you out or make you feel like, oh, gosh, I don't want this anymore. Those are like just our name. Yes. What about you? What do you think?

SPEAKER_01 25:58

I think one would be the same. Right. Noticing that I'm starting to resent that particular assignment that I have. Right. That particular role of responsibility I have. I'm resenting it. I will say this, too. I think. We probably, well, I'll speak for me. I think I've given my roles too much responsibility.

SPEAKER_00 26:22

Yes. Not

SPEAKER_01 26:23

that the role, yes, is a responsibility. And what I mean by that is my role can't fulfill me in the way that I was meant hoping it could or would. And because I put so much responsibility on that, then yes, that's 100% of the time going to lead to resentment. It just is. I don't, I feel like it's, I know it's inevitable because again, it's an assignment. It's not my purpose. It's not part of my, excuse me, not part of my identity. It's not who I am. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 27:17

So really what we're saying is even when you're in that space of questioning who you are and what your identity may be in this next season of life, one of the. I think one of the shifts that you will need to make or kind of hold on to is the fact that you cannot rebuild your identity by dragging your old one into this new season. So if you're saying that you want something different for yourself, if you have constantly been sitting with the question of who am I? What do I bring to the table? What is my purpose? You have to give yourself permission to outgrow who you were, even if she was amazing, even if you are proud of her, even if you still love parts of her, those parts can come with you, but you cannot drag all parts. Not the whole thing. Not the whole thing. It is okay to allow those other parts to rest. They have served their purpose. They have gotten you to the place that you are today. And now it's time for you to step into more of who you are becoming

SPEAKER_01 28:30

yes right that's true that's true for the mom who's raised her children and they are grown or even if they're just young adults right and you're gently pushing them out of the nest it's okay that was the assignment or that was your purpose for the time for that season it's okay to move on to the next thing you didn't waste time no You didn't lose anything. You're still worthy. You're still valuable. Now you can move forward to your act two or act three, depending on what season of your life you became a mom. It's okay. You don't have to only feel resentment about, because it's not for me to tell people not to resent their roles, but if that's something you're working through, please work through that with someone you trust, hopefully a professional, but As you move through the resentment or whatever it is you feel like you lost, consider what you've gained. It's not a small thing to raise little people to be successful adults. That's a huge responsibility. If you're not a mom, to hold down a household while your husband works or your partner is working. And if you're working too, those are huge responsibilities. Those are not roles that are to be taken lightly and to be dismissed like, oh, I'm only a. I'm only a stay-at-home wife or I'm only a mom. We're not saying that, but I think it's important to consider that every, first of all, everyone can't, a lot of women become moms and don't want to do the job of a mom. So there's that. So, the fact that you are choosing to follow through with actually showing up in the most amazing way as a mom, don't dismiss that. Like it's not a big deal. It's a huge deal. So once you have done that and yeah, you'll always be a mom, but once your children are adults, it's okay for you to start your act two or your act three and do some more things that you love. Of course, ideally while you are momming, you will be able to kind of sprinkle in some time for yourself and kind of nurture your own gifts and have time with friends and learn what you like and love that's not always feasible for some moms

SPEAKER_00 30:48

and that's okay yes

SPEAKER_01 30:50

i think to see that as being okay is a choice though you can choose to um to let it pull you down or you can choose to see it as well no it's not my time yet as soon as these babies get grown

SPEAKER_00 31:06

yes i'm gonna do me

SPEAKER_01 31:07

outside that's right Jeremiah 1 and 5 says, before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born, I set you apart. Before you were a mom, a wife, a boss, a caretaker, if you're taking care of children or aging parents, God already knew your name. He already knew your identity in him has not changed. It won't change. Your assignments just change. That's it. And even for me, I'm going to... I'm going to continue to remind myself that this is my assignment so that I won't start to feel lost because I know it can happen before you even realize it. So even if you're trying to rebuild your life within a role that you currently have or after your assignment has ended in a role, you don't have to. it's okay to remind yourself that even if all of my roles or responsibilities have been taken away, stripped away, who I am in God still remains the same. And that's beautiful to me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 32:17

Yes. That was, that was good. Yeah. So let's take a quick shift over here. We're going to give you some of those practical tools that you can use to, some action steps. And I think it goes back to one of the points that we made earlier when I mentioned a lot of people will notice that like, hey, there's a disconnect when we start to ask the question of like, hey, how are you? What's your name? What do you know? All of that. So we wanted to share this exercise that we both use with our clients. And I know that I've even used it with myself before. So this is something that it will at least get you started on this role to like just shifting yourself from living in the outdated version of who you were and now stepping into your becoming. So we call this the I am exercise. So what we want you to do while you're already journaling, if you have the opportunity to journal, we want you to write down my name is blank. I am you fill in the blank, blank, blank and blank. So for example, my name is Felicia. I am passionate, I am silly, and I am compassionate. Of course, there are other things that I do. So in that you can talk about, we don't want you to talk about, excuse me, we don't want you to talk about your roles or titles because again, as you mentioned earlier, those are assignments. And assignments don't define who we are. It's just the things that we do. So when you start to write out who you are and then you fill in the blanks, three ways to describe or define yourself outside of what you do will be helpful. So I want you to try to exercise or give them something so they can have two different examples.

SPEAKER_01 34:25

Okay. So my name is Krystalyn. I am a... A low-key introvert, but that's okay.

SPEAKER_00 34:34

Girl. Okay. I

SPEAKER_01 34:38

like to stay inside. I don't like to be outside.

SPEAKER_00 34:41

Okay, so let's just say you like to stay inside. You a homebody.

SPEAKER_01 34:47

Because you're not an introvert. No, no, I'm just kidding. But no, my name is Crystal and I am a homebody. Felicia is right. And I love books. I am an avid reader of all types of books. Self-help books, murder mysteries, romance novels, devotionals, all

SPEAKER_00 35:06

the things. Oh my God, I learned something new about you i love books too but i didn't know that okay

SPEAKER_01 35:11

yes all the books i'm not um i don't really like anime as much um

SPEAKER_00 35:17

but

SPEAKER_01 35:18

yeah but i will read just about anything so

SPEAKER_00 35:20

yeah

SPEAKER_01 35:20

okay

SPEAKER_00 35:21

All right. So what we want you to do is to do this once a week for at least a month and see what patterns show up. Now, I know that y'all are probably saying y'all are asking for a lot, but sis, we promise this will be so beneficial for you. So just try for a month. You can break it up. If you want to do fill in one blank at a time, that is fine. You don't have to sit there and spend hours, but just devote a little bit of time for you to do this exercise.

SPEAKER_01 35:54

Yes, yes. So we want you guys to know your worth is... it's not rooted in the season that you're in. It's not rooted in the title that you hold. It's not even rooted in the roles that you really, really do well. And those are important, not minimizing any of that. But you are allowed to evolve. You're allowed to change. You are allowed to have a one-year plan, not a five-year plan. Like that's, it's okay.

SPEAKER_00 36:25

It

SPEAKER_01 36:25

is okay. You're allowed to learn who you are again You're allowed to start over or start again. I think I like that better. I think I like the idea of starting again. I don't know what kind of life, if we only focused on, well, this is my thing I got to do and then that's it. That's not living. That's just existing. And the more you trust that you can start over again, So that's the new language we're going to be using. The more that you trust that you can start again, the more that you can be OK with knowing that your roles are your assignment. You can start to trust that. You know what? I'm going to be all right. I might not know what's going to happen five years down the road, but I got a six month plan kind of worked out. And that's OK. It's OK. You get to choose what happens next.

SPEAKER_00 37:21

Yes. So before we close out this episode, you know, we love to give you some fuel for the road ahead. We like to call this our rest stop. So we have a journal prop for you. Here we go. Who am I becoming in this season? And what's one old expectation for myself? I need to release to make room for her. Mm

SPEAKER_01 37:45

hmm.

SPEAKER_00 37:47

So this isn't about rewriting your whole identity today. It's just about noticing what no longer fits and giving yourself permission to put it down.

SPEAKER_01 37:59

Yeah, I like that. Who am I becoming in this season?

SPEAKER_00 38:03

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 38:03

Yeah. So we also want you to take one small step today. Yes, we already gave y'all another step earlier, but this is another step, right? So two small steps today. So the first thing y'all going to do is try the I am exercise. And the second step will be to write down one thing you've been holding on to that belongs to the past version of you. A role, a responsibility, a way of measuring your worth, right? And that could be because you're waiting for someone to say you did a good job or thank you. Then the second. So the first thing you do is write it down, write down the thing that you've been holding on to that belongs to a past version of you. Then either cross it out on a piece of paper or physically throw the paper away and say, I am allowed to change. I'm allowed to change. We talk about growth all the time, y'all, but that's not just about your mental wellness.

SPEAKER_00 39:03

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 39:04

That's great. But what else do you want to change? You can change whenever you get ready. You can do things a different way, whatever you get ready. Okay. This small thing is going to be your way of releasing the thing that's been holding you back and helping you to make space for the woman God created you to be.

SPEAKER_00 39:24

All right, sis. We want to thank you so much for listening to today's episode. If you haven't already, please rate the show and leave us a comment. We love to read them. It is also the motivation to keep us going. Also, if you haven't followed us on social media, please do so. We'll make sure that we have all of that in the show notes. But again, we thank you so much and we hope that you take real good care of yourself.

SPEAKER_01 39:53

All right, peace. Peace.